On the Eve

Satya Rose will be 5 months tomorrow and each day I am amazed how quickly time has passed.  Each day is a blessing although lately I have grown tired and weary of New York City.  I am grateful for all the wonderful things I have in my life and much more grateful for my beautiful healthy girl, as I walk the streets and read articles I see the sadness all around me, hoping I could help everyone I can't help but think of how lucky I am.  Many natural disasters have been occuring more frequently the world over. So many that in fact it makes you pause and think how each day can be a miracle...Bodies showing up along coastlines and borders, missing people from the tsunami in Japan...Mad women and mothers killing their children. When I look into Satya's eyes I can't help but feel all the fragility that is the human race and all that beauty we take for granted.  I knew that having children would be life changing.  As a child I always lived with a guilt and a wondering of how I was one of the "lucky" children, to have my parents and to have a home, food on the table, especially after seeing the commercials for the Children's fund, children rummaging through garbage. I would cry as a child out of the guilt and out of the injustice that some didn't have what I had but never thought of children that had "more." 

A few decades have passed and I am more aware of the world and despair that exists today and more distraught and tormented by the state of the world, feeling helpless as I watch New Yorkers, Americans and the world walk around like sheep with Ipod/Ipads/Kindles in hand in a trance of sorts ignoring the world around us and the reality that is war, hunger, poverty, greediness and lack of interest for our world as a whole, where spirituality and religion are history and shelves of books.  It makes me think that we are just riding a wave and downward spiral that will bring us all down to the point where we are stripped of all that is really precious in life, all that we have taken for granted.